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While for some Mother’s Day is a day to celebrate and look forward to, for those who have lost their own Mother the lead up to Mother’s Day can be fraught with sadness and difficulty.

Regardless of whether your grief is fresh or if it’s been many years since you’ve lost your mum, here are some tips to help you get through the day your way.

Give yourself permission to grieve

Sometimes the lead up to Mother’s Day can be harder than the day itself. Understanding that this is going to be a difficult time and giving yourself the space and permission to grieve can help. As can letting it all out and having a good cry if you need it.

Focus on self care

Treating yourself with gentleness and care can make a big difference to how you feel on the day. Rather than pushing yourself to accept invites that you may not feel comfortable attending, plan a day where you can focus on what you want to do – whether that’s spending time alone or with other family members. 

Consider staying off social media

Social media is always awash with happy Mother’s Day posts and sometimes continuously scrolling through everyone else’s happiness and family gatherings only serves to shine a spotlight on what you are missing out on. So, if you feel that might be the case, sign out of your social media accounts and enjoy a digital detox for the day.

Mark the day in a way that’s special to you

Spending the day in a way that helps you celebrate your mum’s life can help you feel closer to your mum and start a new tradition that helps you look forward to the day in years to come. Whether it’s by bringing new flowers to the cemetery, lighting a scented candle or planting a special memorial garden, look for something you enjoy that will also help you keep your mum’s memory alive.

Focus on the good memories

Focusing on the things you loved most about your mum and some of your most cherished memories together can be a way that you feel connected on Mother’s Day. Keeping her memory alive by telling these stories to your children and grandchildren is also a great way to keep these precious family stories passing down to the next generation.

Seek support

Lastly, if you are having an especially hard time don’t be afraid to open up to a family member or a professional counsellor. A good place to start if you are struggling is to call GriefLine on 03 9935 7400 or 1300 845 745 (landline only).

dealing with grief on mothers day

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Belinda Peters
Belinda brings more than 17 years experience in journalism to her role as Seasons Digital Content Writer. As our blog editor, Belinda will take the confusion out of aged care with entertaining and informative stories from across the aged care industry and our Seasons communities.